To Catch an Assassin
by Evil-chan
Summary: How do you capture an illusive assassin? Simple! Just send an assassin just as good and elusive. Now things would really get complicated if they were to fall in love...Read and Review, por favor!Suspenseromance
1. We'Re already in Hell

Hello! Tis I Evil-chan! I'm not gonna go into all into detail about who I am and all that jazz…That's what the my profile is for, not like there is anything interesting about me! I am as normal as normal can be! **Introduce us damn it! **Oh yes this is D.C, my evil side—**Yo! **And C.F my good side-- _nice to meet you!_ They are helping me with my story! So yeah…Yaaaay! Finally, my first fanfic. Reviews are of course welcomed and even flames, go ahead flame me I dare ya' NYAH NYAH! Even if no one reviews or very few people review I AM going to finish "To Catch an Assassin…" no matter what!...Unless D.C kills me in the near future or the Men-in-White capture me—again. **Hey, dumbass! **sigh yes --.**I want to give a shout out! **_Me too! _OOOooh okay! **Hey BlackFairy! You better review! **_Harmony, it's me! Just wanted to say hi and I hope you enjoy the story; feel free to review, please! _Evie-kichi!Ale-chan! I did it I did it la-dee-da-dee-daaaaahhhh! I told ya' I'd do it! YOU BETTER REVIEW! Well with that done…..Enjoy _the _**story! **Oh, yes, here is the long, summary; the one that actually makes sense…

**_Summary: In a crime infested city, the assassin, Celestial Archer, helps rid the city from the evil men and demons who dominate it. But, is there more to this assassin then a modern-day hero/ good Samaritan; or is there another purpose to the killings, maybe…Revenge? What's more another infamous assassin has been hired, by the nefarious Naraku, no less, to hunt down the Celestial Archer and to find out C.A's true identity. What will happen when the two meet? Will spark fly or will they kill each other first? OOoooOOooh o Tum-tum-tuuuuummm! Read our damn story to find out!_**

**_To Catch an Assassin..,_**

**Chapter one: We're Already in Hell….**

_**7 Years ago…**_



They waited for him…The one who calls himself Naraku in the old, run-down cemetery, the appointed meeting location once the mission was completed.

They surveyed their surroundings for any security guards, though they doubted there were any; most of the security was transferred to the new cemetery a few months ago. All that stood were the graffiti-ed head-stones lined up in numerous rows, and the weeds suffocating the graves. The wind howled a sad song through the dark night. Nothing like a night in the cemetery…

They were two in total. Both men were tall and burly, their black clothes were stained and disheveled; the shortest of the two men had a fresh wound on his cheek. They were two suspicious characters…The kind of men your mother warned you about, the kind that weren't afraid to kill. Muscular and with malice etched into their faces they waited for their boss. Their coats shifted with the howl of the wind, the acrid smell of gasoline wafted from their clothes.

The taller of the two spoke first, while the other searched for a cigarette, "You think he'll come?" He asked gruffly; his reply was a unconcerned shrug from his partner as he lit his cigarette. "I can't believe we went through all that trouble for this pink…marble." "Jewel,' the scarred one corrected. "Wha'?" "It's a jewel dumbass!" Came the impatient reply. His comrade just grumbled, 'Whatever, fucking smartass.." "You got it?" "No shit, it's in my pocket.' After that friendly conversation they stood in silence and lapsed into thought.

Both thought of what they'd do with their share of the hundred grand and of their last mission. The family of priests and priestess they just murdered went down so damn easily…down to ashes; the fear in their eyes was absolutely priceless! It was a shame they had to kill the two young women—But everyone had to die, they smiled, and everyone did die. Still…they could've at least raped them before killing them, especially the feisty one that managed to graze one of them with an arrow. Tsk, tsk, what a waste. Oh well, they'd just fix their desire with some good, willing whores. Who says money can't buy happiness?

Their "pleasant" thoughts were interrupted by the rhythmic sound of grass being crushed behind them— Footsteps. Swiftly, they drew their guns to the menacing figure shaded by the nearby oak tree. "Did you get it?" A deep voice, coolly inquired…A voice that was lavished with such malicious, evil, the thin hair at the nape of the men's neck stood on end. (A/N: Yeah, you better be scared you evil men you! How dare you do such a despicable crime like- _Uh Elvia, please don't give away the story._ **Yeah shut up!** --…Fine) "Y-Yeah we got it," one of them stuttered out. "Where's the cash?" The crony asked, anxious to get the meeting over and done with. "First put those guns down and give me the jewel." Reluctantly, they obeyed. The tall one searched his pocket and took out the pink jewel and threw it at his boss. Naraku caught it in mid-air…"What! This is not the jewel!" He yelled with black fury. The two men stepped back in fear, "B- But," the shortest one tried to speak, "It was what they were protecting, it was what that wench fought for before we killed her!"

"This," bellowed Naraku, "this is a cheap imitation sold by the shrine for a damn profit!" The duo cringed as red eyes raked over them with obvious distaste. "You fools… I have no use for you two anymore."

"Whaddayame-"The tallest didn't get to finish. Blood gushed out, like water from a spigot, from his mouth; his eyes widened as he heard the sickening _squilsh_ as Naraku's appendage retracted from the man's chest. (A/N Oooh Oooh ha ha you dead you dead OOooh Oooh!) He crumpled to the grass on a crimson puddle. Naraku smiled. " The bigger they are—" He was interrupted by the persistent pokes of bullets as they pierced his chest. "Bastard!" The living man yelled as he continued to shoot, "Damn you to hell!" A figure sped toward him in an astonishing speed and grabbed the annoying mortal by his neck. He easily lifted him from the ground. He whispered coolly into the man's ear, "We're already in Hell." The man's neck snapped easily…Another lifeless body hit the ground. (A/N….HAHA Serves you- mph! ** Just shut the fuck up!) **

With those two annoyances dealt with, Naraku pondered over his present dilemma. He was soooo close, but now, the jewel disappeared…Again. Suddenly, something within him begged for release, forcefully he pushed it back. _Damn nuisance _he thought, but on to more pressing problems. Where was the jewel? He'd get it he swore to himself, he _will_! Now the most pressing question…_Who_ had it?



_Recent Day:_

_11:45 P.M_

A lone figure spryly dashed through the road. _He is trying to escape…But I'm way ahead of him,_ the figure thought. Sprinting through the bushes, tall grass and trees of the rural part of Tokyo, the view of the bridge leading into the docks came into view. _ He won't escape._ The assassin quickly hid behind a thick, sturdy tree; the assassin's weapon was readied. _Now I wait._

(A/N OOOooooOohh TUM-TUM-TUUMMM! **Just ignore the dumbass)**



Satsu Muzai impatiently tapped his long, manicured fingers on his knee. They were almost there…The docks. His private ship was waiting for him, to sail to America; waiting for him to make his escape. He bit his bottom lip angrily, blood seeped from the self-inflicted wound, but, he didn't feel the pain. He was too preoccupied, thinking back to the cause of this mess. A note. Yes, the cause of all this mayhem began with one, infamous note; one note that was looked upon as a plague by the evil men and demons in the realm of the underworld. Such despised and feared memorandum was (true as the rumors went) found impaled by an arrow and lodged into the door of his mansion.

The reminder was short…

_You have three days…I'll be watching. _

Two arrows both intersecting each other,forming an "x" were drawn at the bottom of the note; the Celestial Archer's famed signature.

_Three days…_The rumors proved true—you had only three days to live. Every recipient (ten so far) has had a three day time-limit. Then, when your time was up, your bones would be found in some location and your body guards wouldn't remember a thing that happened. You've fallen prey to the Celestial Archer.

He grounded his teeth, how infuriating! Running away from a veiled assailant wielding a bow and arrow! How, how fictitious! But this wasn't fiction…(A/N Actually this story is a fiction story so pretty much-- ** Arrrgh Elvia is smacked with the binder **xx ow!) The last ten demons/humans who received the note died in the promised deadline; no one lived a day longer. All that was left was a skeleton in a clean heap. Damn it, Damn It, DAMN IT! He banged his fists onto the mini bar right besides him, the crystal glasses tinkled. NO, not me; not Satsu Muzai, youkai and feared by all humans. He was going to live and kill this Celestial Archer, if he got in his way!_ That's what the last victim of the Celestial Archer thought_, his traitorous mind negated. _ No he was arrogant and a fool, the last demon thought he'd take on the Celestial Archer alone. No, I'm prepared, my men are in front and behind me, armed, the limo was bullet-proof all the way to the damn tires!_ He would have asked his "friends" for help but those damn, fucking cowards avoided him like he had leprosy ever since they found out about the note. But he didn't need 'em, he reiterated to himself, he was perfectly capable to do this alone. Yet, these thoughts did not reassure him. He felt the icy tendrils of fear creeping onto him; his instinct warned him of imminent danger. For once in his life, Satsu Muzai was pissin' scared. The Butcher, his nickname in the underworld by both those that feared and admired him, was scared. Him, The Butcher, who has had killed, stolen, embezzled, and committed many lustful acts of rape. Satsu Muzai, who not even the police can touch because he was that powerful. He, the hunter…

Being hunted.

By an assassin with such a gay name as the Celestial Archer! A modern day Angel of Retribution. An illusive opponent no one has heard of or seen …The mysterious Celestial Archer. What the fuck was the world coming too!

As he reached for some sherry, his keen peripheral vision caught the glow of a dull pink light coming closer from the right window…Then the explosion was followed. The limo spun and tilted crazily as the bullet-proof back tire was disintegrated. The driver tried franticly to regain control but, the weight tilted too much to its left and the limo crashed to its left side. Muzai crashed his head onto the window with such bone-crushing force that if he were human he'd be dead. On the brink of consciousness he heard the trample of his hired men running to his aid.

Silence ensued as the body guards searched for any threat. "There!" A voice yelled. "By the tree! There he is!" A staccato of bullets rattled the air. Dust flew in a blinding cloud, obscuring their vision. They stopped and waited anxiously until the dust settled. No one was there. Tentatively they searched the perimeter…No one. Then they heard the small _spppss_ sound coming from beneath them. In unison they looked down, a spherical blue object _sppps-ed_, and then abruptly stopped.

Satsu felt another explosion vibrate the limousine. A blue-greenish gas could be seen, like fog, from the window. His hyped senses smelled a nauseating odor; he retched and his eyes burned…Ten-seconds later the noxious gas disappeared along with stench. Wildly, he scrambled out of the limo through the sun-roof. Once out he realized the danger he had just scrambled into. His men lay scattered in unconscious heaps…He was a sitting duck. (A/N Quack!) "Are you ready?" A voice questioned. Muzai's gaze skittered towards his right. There he was, leaning against a tree, his arms nonchalantly crossed on his chest, what seemed to be a long pony-tail artlessly lay on his shoulder; he was silhouetted by the fat tree he was leaning against. "So, are you ready?" The voice repeated. Odd, but there was something about the whisper-of-a-voice that didn't sit to well with him… Muzai found his voice, "To die? Not a chance." Rapidly he threw blades of lightening. (A/N O0 OooOohh lightening demon!) He managed to graze the Celestial Archer but he managed to jump away from any major damage. He heard a thump from behind him. He turned to see the Celestial Archer standing on the side of his limo; then the sight before him momentarily froze him to the core. It seemed his last assault managed to tear the hair-band that held the pony-tail; now raven locks danced gracefully with the wind as the Celestial Archer stood watching him attentively. _He was a she!_ Now that the assassin was doused in moonlight it was much easier to see (and appreciate) the female figure that was always hidden by shadow and her priestess clothing (A/N: Think Kikyo's only dark blue!). Suddenly, the shock that a _woman_ was the cause of all the deaths and pandemonium in the underground realm enraged him._ I was afraid of a mere woman playing the Masked Avenger…_ "You seem to be shocked to find out that I'm a woman…" She stated casually, her weapon was already strung and aimed. His disbelief and anger shook him to the core that he sent a lightening attack that struck the Celestial Archer so fast and strong that no one would have been able to escape from the attack, much less survive. He smiled wickedly, _pathetic_ _woman…they are only meant to rape and for pleasure…_ He chuckled at the easy defeat of the feared Celestial Archer; he was a hero! But, his laughs of triumph got lodged into his throat at the sight before him. Enveloped by a pink barrier, the Celestial Archer stood unharmed. If it weren't for the veil that covered her face, Muzai would swear that she was smiling. _A miko!...And a woman?_ Satsu Muzai's bones shook.

Her face was passive, "are you prepared?" He knew he was going to die…just like the others. "May _Kami_ forgive you for your sins.' She released the bowstring. His screams echoed into the night. Once the purification process was completed, all that was left was a clean, purified skeleton…just like the others. The Celestial Archer turned on her heel and left the execution site. But unbeknownst to her, far away a witness quietly left the scene, ready to make a call.



_In Some Unknown Place_

…_Still recent day:_

_12:30 AM_

"Ah, so we have a renegade miko then?" A sinister chuckle echoed through the study. "Well, then thank you Kanna, stand-bye for further instructions." A click was heard as the phone was put into its cradle. Naraku sat back and thought over this new bit of information. An insistent _whoosh-snap-click _of a fan being opened and closed disturbed his thoughts. "Kagura, cease the damn noise!" The noise stopped.

"Do you think she may have it?" asked a rebellious incarnation.

"I don't know, but something tells me to pursue this enigma known as the Celestial Archer."

"Are you going to try to capture this assassin? Many say it's impossible." Kagura shuddered as his laughter filled the study once again.

"Who ever said _I_ would be the one capturing the illusive Celestial Archer? Besides, ever heard of catching fire with fire? Only this time to catch an assassin…."

"So, who are we sending to do the dirty work—again?" She asked distastefully, she hated the thought of using people and/or demons…She should know.

"My, my, aren't we chatty tonight eh, Kagura?" She just shrugged.

"Of course, I'll only send the best…," Naraku said.

Mildly interested, Kagura asked, "Who?"

Another wicked smile." Why the reputable Hanyou, of course."

" I heard he was hard to hire and that he only kills who he deems fit…"

"Well, if money won't persuade him; I'll just use my own sort of _persuasion…_Besides, these assassins are more brawn then brain." Naraku picked up the phone from his cradle, "now Kagura leave me while I make a call to a certain Hanyou."

For once Kagura didn't argue against the order.



OOwwww my head hurts! Why'd you have to hit me so hard? **Because you wouldn't damn, fucking shut up and stop interrupting the story!** _Now can we please refrain from using swear words, and Elvia you have to learn to stop interrupting while we are typing the story._ But you girls were typing most of it! I wanted to have some input! Anywayz, WELL, WELL , WEEEEELLL DID YOU PEOPLE LIKE IT? I am sooo sorry that this was such a short chapter but, I promise to try to type more for the next chapter. Any sort of criticism is wanted! But, the bad kind or flames, will be answered by D.C or just plain ignored…so yeah. Well, I am tired and my head really hurts (Elvia sends death glares to D.C) !** Yeah,well we better go and continue our vacation. **_Yes, Harmony and Blackfairy must be waiting!_ Well, byez!

Evil-chan

_C.F_

**D.C**

What will happen in the next chapter? Who is Hanyou, as if we don't already know, and Elvia you better watch out your going to walk into the w-)

BONK! OWCHIE!

(Wall again…--; sigh why me. Well tune in for the next chapter in "To Catch an Assassin" Oh and Elvia's best friend..er…Ale-chan? I AM NOT GAY! GOT IT? AND BENJAMIN IS NOT A GAY NAME!YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH IT? THEN TALK TO MY MOTHER! BESIDES I GOT A GIRLFRIEND, NYAH NYAH!Ahem, uhhh yeah just thought I'd clarify that…Bye!) o0 Narrators are weird…


	2. Hello this is Hanyou's contactor

Okay, I know I've already typed this chapter and everything but, I had a lot of grammatical errors and I felt that the chapter was all…blah! I don't know why but I have a story-perfect-ism fetish and get this incontrollable twitch whenever I see a misspelled word or something wrong in my stories…This is just a **_revised_** chapter two; the story will end the same as the last chapter, but some things_ might_ be tweaked a bit. THANK YOU TO YOU ALL MY REVIEWERS! I'M ONLY DOING THIS FOR YOU! I mean right now I can be looking up stuff in the internet and playing games but nooooo I strive for perfection in my stories (and fast updates); which is odd cuz' I am a very disorganized person…Anywho, I shall type this chapter as fast as I can that way start chappie tres! D.C wanna say anything? **No. **Oh-kay…C.F? _I am fine!_ Well this is odd; Benjy? …Who is my narrator not a good/bad side of mine! Puh-lease I have enough with D.C! (Yes! I would like to announce my undying love for Violet hahahah aiiaiaiiaia!) 00…-- sigh C.F I thought you hid the Dr.Pib! _I did! _Grrr-eat I have a sugar high narrator…I am so jealous! **Ahem! **Oh yeah! Now along with story!

Chapter 2!

**_Hello, this is Hanyou's contactor speaking…_**

_Ring…Ring…Ri-click_

"Hello, this is Hanyou's contactor speaking!" A cheerful, masculine voice answered the phone, he continued with his memorized introduction," State your name and the person you'd like murdered!" He stated with such air of triviality that it seemed he was taking orders for a customer at WacDonalds, not an assassination.

"Naraku—"a frigid voice answered. "And I actually would like a person found—"

"I am sorry Mr. Naraku,' the contactor interrupted, remorseless, "But the person you want to hire is an as-sas-sin," he drawled out the syllables,"…or is that ass-as-sin? He is an ass though, so I guess the latter would deem more fit for him, hmmm toughie. Aah, I'll look that up later."

"…." (A/N: Puzzled silence in the other end…OOoooOOOoh Naraku is dumb-founded speechless for once! Boo-yea-OW! **Get on with the damn story!)**

**"**Anywho, Hanyou is not an investigator. He finds people; and kills 'em!" The contactor extended with glee. "If you want to find someone I'd suggest for you to hire a private investigator, notify the police, or…OH! You can put up flyers in that missing person's bulletin at Wal-Mart! I don't know how that organization works but I heard they've found like, hundreds of missing people. I don't know if they are alive or dead, but you didn't say if you-"

Finally, Naraku interrupted the contactor's ongoing tangent with coolness, albeit a smidge of impatience,"Yes, I am aware of the multiple ways I can find a missing person, and I am confident the person I want found is alive; but I doubt even Wal-Mart can help me or the authorities, for that matter…I need someone with more expertise and efficiency."

There was blessed silence on the other line, then—"I'm listening.

_**Later:**_

After months of searching the breadth of America and clever plotting, the assassination was finally complete.

Most cases took less time, but the sleazy father he was hired to kill managed to escape in the first assassination attempt (damn helicopters); and like any coward he went into hiding. Of course, Hanyou found him in some Podunk town in Indiana after a couple weeks. Damn bastard deserved to die…Anyone who would try to kill his own wife for the sole purpose to get his greedy hands on her inherency money just to pay off the lone sharks he's indebted too deserves to rot in hell. Like many of his cases…It was a murder, but not a crime (A/N: Line borrowed from the movie _Chicago_! I wuv that movie! It's all cool and bad-ass and…00 ahem on with ze story!). Now it was good to return to Kyoto...Home sweet home.

He parked his red Viper (A/N: I want one of those drools **dork**) on the driveway, took his duffel bag and supplies from the trunk and made his way to his mediocre brown-bricked house. _There is no place like home_ he mused. As soon as he opened the door he was bombarded…There was no escape from the verbal tirade.

"It's about time Inuyasha!" A voice rang out from the darkness. "Do you have any idea how long you took? Do you think that I enjoy house-sitting, or do you the great personal sacrifice being your co-conspirator is for moi? Right now I could be with a lovely woman enjoying dinner or her…lovely assets. I could be in the fires of passion, at the apex of sexual desire, conceiving my child; or better yet…Sigh, I can be with my dearest Sango, aaahh! But, noooo I don't think you realize that…"

Inuyasha inwardly groaned,"Hi Miroku, missed ya too; I brought you that souvenir you wanted from America; if you still want it shut up!" He tried to evade.

But to no avail…"—I like to think myself as the Johnny Dep or sex symbol, if you will, of this generation. So you can imagine the number of women I've had to put down and say no too…" The dam was broken and the babble surged relentless.

Inuyasha decided to use a more tactical approach towards the rambling idiot; he ignored hi, simple, yet effective. (**D.C/N: Hmmm, Miroku reminds me of someone… **Really? Who?...0 HEY!).Once his duffel bag and supplies were in their designated place, AKA the floor and jammed in the closet, Inuyasha made a beeline towards the fridge. "Any messages?" He asked as he opened the fridge, it was—Empty.

"For you? Pfft, as if! For Hanyou? Plenty!" went the reply.

"How many?" Inuyasha inquired as he opened the freezer—Empty…Even the ice cube trays.

"You've accumulated about one hundred seventy five requests for hire. Of course, most of them were from untrustworthy and shady people or the usual, do-in-my-grandma/mom/dad/child/etcetera-for-I-can-collect-the-inusrance-money requests,' Miroku said with evident disgust.

"Are there any worth the pursuit?" Inuyasha ruffed as stomped towards the cupboards, his stomach growled and his temple vein pulsed with apparent irritation of the lack of food in _his_ house. Cupboard #1: Empty! (pulse)

"Oh, sure we got a few—"

Cupboard #2-Nada (Pulse-Pulse) (A/N: We got Nada…three!)

"—I have to check if they are liable and for a worthy cause though—"

Cupboard #3- Zilch (Pulse-Pulse-PULSE-temperature rising)

"—But the one I am positive you'll want to pursue was a request made not to long ago—" the man went on unaware of the very hungry and _very _irritated hanyou seething in the kitchen.

Microwave—Cup of Ramen! Grinning he picked up the weightless cup. He frowned, "wait a minute…" He peeked inside the cup, it was—EMPTY! (Beep BEEP! ABORT, ABORT PISSED OFF HALF DEMON RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!)

"I believe that you will take this case, though it is a bit different—"

"WHERE THE HELL IS MY FOOD!"An angry voice exploded from the kitchen with some colorful four-lettered expletives.

"Well I ate it of…" the pompous admission trailed away as Miroku came face to face with a hot tempered hanyou, who, by the way, was cracking his knuckles in a threatening manner. Miroku gulped," Uhhh, er, evil monkies! Yes evil monkies stole it all!" He lied lamely, as he backed away slowly—very, very slowly.

"Try again." Inuyasha growled lethally, slowly advancing toward his quarry.

An oh-shit smile crept up his face as he vigorously thought for a brilliant lie…Eureka! "Midgets! Hungry, rabid, escaped-from-a-freak-show midgets crashed in and stole the food! I only-Ack!" Miroku didn't finish his "brilliant" lie because of the steel grip that was squishing his trachea.

"Ack! Can't—Gasp—Breathe—Wheeze!"

"That's the point!" Inuyasha emphasized with a shake. "Any last words?" he growled sadistically.

"Next—case—involves—Shikon—Jewel" Miroku barely gasped out as he dramatically feigned dying by lolling his head limply, suck his tongue out, and rolled his eyes.

Unfortunately, Inuyasha abruptly released him as his mind registered the last statement; "OW!" Miroku cried as he impacted the floor. He was instantly yanked back up and Inuyasha commenced shaking Miroku, none too gently.

"Where? What? Who? Details Miro!" Inuyasha shook eagerly.

"S-stop shaking meee and i-I'll tell ya'!"

Immediately the shaking stopped," So this is how shaken up coke bottles feel! I now have a deep sympathy for them," He said dizzily.

"Miroku…" Inuyasha drawled impatiently.

"Naraku is the client," a serious Miroku informed,' all you have to do is find someone, find out everything about her, give Naraku the info and he will give you some valuable information on the Shikon Jewel and two million dollars. Now, you can take this job—"

"I'll do it.'

"But we haven't checked if he is trustworthy or if the person wants to be fo—"

Miroku started.

"I'll do it.' Inuyasha said with such finality, that it left no room for argument. Miroku nodded his head in acquiesce. Besides, he knew the importance this information was for Inuyasha.

"So who do I have find?" Inuyasha asked dispelling the silence.

Miroku grinned.

Oh no, Inuyasha thought with a foreboding feeling, not _the_grin…(A/N: Tum-tum-tuuumm)

"Hee-hee."

Oh crap! Not the _hee-hee_! (A/N: Double tum-tum-tuummm!) Inuyasha waited for the inevitable.

"Well you see there is a catch." Miroku began.

Ah, shit! Not _the Catch!_

(Elvia sighs with relief) Sigh, I feel soooo much better with this chapter. _As do I! _Yaaay, finally the perfectionist in me is satisfied! ( Perfectionist?) **Have you seen your backpack Miss. Perfectionist? **(Elvia plays with her fingers) --; Okay I may not be the cleanest person in the universe… **That's an understatement. **But I really despise when I write a chapter and I get a feeling that I could have done better; besides, I had misspelling errors! Anywho, I hope this chapter is better and much more informative and entertaining! I shall start typing shall start with chapter three; yaaay I am really getting into this, I just hope I don't get writers block. Ag, knock on wood! Anywho, Any advice, compliments, flames, whatever just click the pwetty button that's labeled submit review! I'm starting to think our story may not be doing so well… Now that I think about it, this I probably Karma getting back at me for all the times I never submitted a review! Waaaaahhh whyyyy meeee! I've already changed my ways! I'll review when I read other people's fanfics I promise! (Who are you talking to?) Karma. **Dumb ass…**Hee-hee, shut-up! I just hope that people are enjoying this story! Well,

Ciao!

_Ja-ne!_

……

(BYE!) ----- this is Benjy (BENJAMIN MY NAME IS BENJAMIN!) Oh, yeah well this is Ben-Ben (ARGH!) my narrator; he is not a good or bad side…he just narrates! (And look after you! Sigh, I don't get paid enough!) You know you wuv me! (NO I DO NOT!) Jeez, you get temperamental once you get your Dr.Pib hangover! (Shut it!) See! No respect! Oh yeah, bye byez all you lovely wonderful people!…hee-hee I managed to type that with a straight face, haha lovely people…riiight.Anywho, adios!


	3. Boy Meets Girl

Yay! I updated early; well, here is chapter three. I am sad to announce that today's chapter is a tad bit short; and I would like to give cyber hugs to my reviewers for chapter two! Grazie, grazie! I have about an hour and a half to finish typing this chapter and submit it before the bell rings; that's right, I love you girls (or guys) so much and I love doing this, writing (typing!) --; yes, Benjy, I meant typing (sure ya' did) SILENCE OR I SHALL TELL VIOLET ABOUT YOUR KITTY SCRAPBOOK MATT SENT ME! (…) Thought so! Anywho, so instead of using the computer to read fanfic, looking up new books in the internet, or any of the other stuff I usually use the computer for, I am updating! Like always this fanfic is for you and I don't own the Inuyasha characters or part of the plot!** Doofus, hurry up! **_Yes, we have a time limit! _Oh, yeah, uh, on with ze chapter! PLEASE REVIEW!

**_Chapter three: Boy meets Girl -_**

_**Two Weeks Later…**_



"Í can't believe all I have to do is find a damn wench and I'll be closer to getting the Shikon Jewel. Pfft, piece of pie." The driver said with a dollop of aplomb as he drove his car with the finesse of a Grand Indy Racer through the highway.

"I wouldn't get to cocky if I were you Inu, remember what I said?" Miroku said lazily from the passenger seat.

"Yeah, yeah, I remember." Inuyasha said roughly; the conversation was still fresh in his mind.



_Flashback_: (AN: The Twighlight Zone theme song plays. OOoooooOOOoo 0)

"I'm supposed to find a newbie assassin who calls himself the Celestial Archer?" Inuyasha inquired incredulously after listening to what the case entailed.

"Yup!" Miroku was obviously getting a kick out of the 00 expression he was wearing.

Inuyasha eyed Miroku with disbelief, searching for a tell-tale heart of a lie; but Miroku wasn't nervous and Inuyasha couldn't smell a hint of a lie." How come I've never heard of this Celestial Archer?" He said the latter two words with apparent distaste.

"Because…A) you've been in America for the past five month, by the way I want the souvenir I asked for!. B) The assassinations started three months ago in Tokyo, and C) Most people here in Kyoto don't know about the assassin—yet." Miroku listed.

"Then how do you know about him?"

Miroku smiled…A leery smile," Whilst visiting my maiden Sango in the vast land if Tokyo—"

"Cut the crap!" Barked (pun intended -) the half-demon.

Miroku sulked at the fact that his tale was cut short," Fine! Here's the condensed version," Miroku took a deep breath,": Celestial Archer is unsurprisingly the talk of the town, of course the people she's killed are bad men who get away with _really _evil shit, so again unsurprisingly the people who've been wronged see her as a hero more than a killer, the police aren't too thrilled of finding the murderer so coincidently they always seem to have a cold case, lack of evidence they explain, which isn't a complete lie after all since the Celestial Archer does not leave any evidence, of course the kingpins and demons of the Underground world are scared and see this assassin as a treat and have threatened to kill anyone they hear say the name Celestial Archer; which is why the name is whispered rather than publicly spoken." Miroku finally finished, gasping for breath.

Inuyasha raise an eyebrow," That's the condensed version?"

Miroku scowled

"So is he any good?"

Miroku noticed the pronoun Inuyasha used and smiled," For a "newbie",' he said emphasizing the latter word with a flick of quotation marks with his hands," She's already killed Satsu Muzai."

The pronoun, however, Miroku used went unnoticed by the hanyou. "That good eh?" Inuyasha said lost in thought, then with a face of disapproval. "Celestial Archer…" He said the name slowly, letting it roll of his tongue; his brows furrowed," What kind of man would call himself the Celestial Archer?"

"No man—"Miroku paused deliberately, his smile getting wider" but a woman would."

"Your right," Inuyasha said absently," maybe he is ga--." Finally the words were absorbed into his thick skull; his eyes popped with realization," WHAT?"

Miroku scowled and laughed at the same time; the laugh for the rare expression of shock displayed on Inuyasha's face; and the scowl because he wished he could capture this moment on capture…where's Kodack when you need it?

_End Flashback: _(A/N Twilight Zone theme song ends)



And here they were in the middle of rush hour in Tokyo, perfect Inuyasha frowned.

"Are you positive you got the right apartments and didn't buy some fake apartment from some con-artist through the internet?"

"For the umpteenth time, Inuyasha, yes already! And that was only one time!" Miroku voiced exasperatingly.

"One time…ONE TIME?" Inuyasha exclaimed. "I was in damn Germany taking on an assassination, looking for an apartment complex that didn't even exist! Do you know how many people speak Japanese in Germany?"

"None?"

"NONE: Inuyasha continued, the number of pulsing veins increasing in numbers," So no surprise that nobody helped me when I asked for freakin' directions…And do you know how cold it is in Germany in the middle of January?"

"Nein!" Miroku teased with a bad German accent.

"It was extremely cold," came the flat answer," So you can't blame me for being a bit wary about the efficiency you take finding room and board."

Miroku chuckled," I'm so glad I decided not to go that time." He stopped his teasing when he saw the dark look glaring at him from the driver's side of the car. "Ahem, I'm positive that," Miroku paused as he took out a crumpled piece of paper with a name and address scrawled on it. "Cherry Blossom View apartment complex exists." He said confidently. Then with a sigh," You know its tough being your contactor, temporary realtor, now and then computer whiz, and twenty-four/seven best friend!"

Inuyasha ignored the drama and instead asked, "Who are you staying with, anyway?'

A sly grin reached his eyes,' Why my dearest Sango, of course."

Inuyasha had a bad feeling of the outcome of such a risk," Oh boy."

"Oh, there's the exit! We're almost there!"

The Viper made a sudden lurch to the right, exited, and sped away.



"Finally, after a whole day taking care of troublesome two-year olds and evening with Me, Myself, and Peace." The female figure clad in scrubs trudged to her apartment and sighed tiredly.

"OW! You damn bastard that was foot! I told you to let go on "three"!" A rancorous voice shouted.

She looked down the flight of stairs she hiked, curious at the commotion being played in Parking Lot B. There, like two children, was a silver-haired man was, with a rather heavy looking box discarded on his foot, yelling out profanities at the other man with a…rat-tail? _I thought the rat-tail died in the eighties_… _hmmm, but it actually suits him_. Though the silver-haired one seemed ready to murder his comrade, the other man, just held his hands palm up in an "I surrender" gesture and said," Now, Inuyasha it was merely an accident. I was distracted, by some, erm, admirable…assets."

The one who was called Inuyasha, who she sensed was a half-demon, turned around and surveyed the parking lot, _what was he looking for?_ She thought. Then his gaze stopped at the view of a woman half in her trunk rummaging for something, leaving her "assets" in clear view of the lecherous men. The woman rolled her eyes and muttered the word perverts and left the scene with the man named Inuyasha shaking his head with disapproval and the one with a rat-tail continued to admire.

She hiked up the flight of stairs until she reached the fourth flight and went into her room, F-4. She flicked on the lights and said," I'm home," wearily. She plopped herself into her rose-colored couch and closed her eyes…that's when she felt a shadow loom over her with evil intention (A/N: Evil! evilyevilyEvilll! **Annoying wench. **HEY!_Elvia, continue with the story!_ Yes, mam…). She snapped her eyes open and lunged out of the couch with gymnastic finesse; but, no amount of agility could have saved her from the assault of the gun….



OHMIGOD! THIS WOULD BE SUCH A PERFECT SPOT TO LEAVE OF MY FIRST CLIFF-HANGER EVER! (Nooo! What happens next?) HAHA! Why should I tell you Benjy? This would be such the perfect revenge against you after you publicized those photos of me! ( Damn you!) **Relax, Benjamin-the-gay-geek-wonder. **(…) Hee-hee, trying not to laugh; but resist laughing at another's expense oh what the heck Hahahaha! **We can't end it now; it's not part of our plan. **_She's right Benjamin. Besides, we had this chapter planned out and a cliff-hanger was not in the agenda. _But, but, I want to-- Audience-NO! Please no cliff-hanger! But I want a cliff-hanger! **Just shut up and type or else to "the wheel" with you! **Nooo! I'm typing! I'M TYPING! _You didn't have to threaten her, you know. _**Hey, it works. **(Oh my pride, doth been wounded!)



_**Meanwhile, outside:**_

Finally, he was situated in his temporary base and he was ready to relax. He grabbed a coke from his, to his joy, very full refrigerator, made his way outside of his apartment and slammed the door…a tad bit to hard. The gold letter and number addressing his apartment address shook and fell off their nails. " Damn it," Inuyasha cursed as he bent down and retrieved the numeral and number and tried to place them back in their proper positions. The F-5 was a bit askew, but he just shrugged it off and leaned over the railing, looking out into the parking lot; where, surprise, surprise, Miroku was flirting with Miss. Admirable-Assets. He took a sip from his Coke and his right ear twitched as he heard a shriek from the room next door.

"YOU ARE SO DEAD!" A roar of indignation rumbled behind the brown wooden door. Said door rapidly opened releasing a teenage boy clutching a large, half-empty water gun and running as if the devil was at his heels. Immediately, a young, drenched woman ran out the door with a throw pillow clutched tightly; her face was contorted with playful anger and she sent a glare that would have been threatening had she not been smiling.

"I'm going to get you back!" with that promise said, she flung the throw pillow at the teenager. It would have hit him squarely in the face…had he not chosen to duck in time.

Inuyasha, who was witnessing the sibling fight with a smirk, however, did not duck. Before Inuyasha wondered if he really saw a flash of pink illuminate from the woman's hand; he saw a rose-colored meteor heading at him.



The throw-pillow-assailant watched in horror as the object hit the innocent bystander. He gave a surprised "Off!" and he jerked involuntary with incredulity causing his drink to spill on his shirt.

As the throw-pillow slid down the innocent-bystander's face, the woman ran to help and apologize. Then she saw the familiar face of the silver haired man from the Parking Lot B Scene. "Oh Kami, I hit the Parking-Lot-B-Pervert!" She thought.

"Ow! Woman you have quite a killer pitch…" He stopped. "Wait, what did ya' call me?"

The woman gasped and clasped her hands around her mouth, _damn it why does my mouth always have a mind of it own? _She franticly thought.

"I'm sorry, about the throw-pillow thing, that was meant for my brother not you, and oh sorry about your shirt too! And for the comment on you being a pervert, I mean you seemed like one looking at the woman's assets and all but how would I know I mean you're a guy and all and I usually judge and I think I'm giving the wrong impression because I think we are neighbors now aren't we? " She finished a looked expectantly, seeking forgiveness from the silver-haired man…what was his name again, she tried to remember.

He just stared….and stared…finally," What?" came the intelligent response.

Oh, great she babbled. She smiled bashfully," uh…Sorry…about, about everything."

He too smiled because her smile was so damn infectious," It's alright. Though I doubt they termed this house-hold commodity a throw-pillow," he said holding up the said object," for the use of throwing it at innocent neighbors."

The woman looked down like a chastened child than an adult," Sorry" she mumbled again.

Inuyasha seemed uncomfortable with her obvious discomfort and embarrassment. He decided to alleviate the gravid atmosphere, "Hey we're neighbors now, so since we didn't exactly meet in a normal way, let's start again. He stuck out his arm in a friendly manner," hi, I am Inuyasha your new neighbor and I haven't caught your name?"

She grinned and accepted his hand and shook it. "I didn't give it. But it's Kagome…Kagome Higurashi, your next door neighbor."



Bum-bum-buuuuummm! Whatcha' think? audience-we liked it! ( My pride has yet to heal…) Oh come of it Benny-Ben! ( I liked it too! Hurry up with the next chapter!) Jeez, can't I get a please? ( Por favor?) Oooohh your Spanish is getting better! Well I have to go now, so yeah; I hope youse people like this chapter, I can't help but feel that I'm improving at least a smidge-of a bit! HORAH for me! **well I have to go for errands! **_Yes, I must buy some groceries and some more toys for Lucky!_ Oh well bye you girls! Now I must really go! Oh yes please review and criticism wanted, the good kind!

Au-revoir


End file.
